Late 30s Korean Man's Heartbreaking Dilemma: Did My Career Cost Me Marriage and Kids?
This post taps into common anxieties among Koreans, especially men, about marriage, age, career sacrifices, and the pressure to have children in a society with declining birth rates. It's relatable for many who feel the clock ticking.
In Korea, there's significant societal pressure to marry and have children, often by a certain age. Men in their late 30s might find it challenging to find partners who are also keen on having children due to age-related fertility concerns, especially if they prioritize younger partners. Career sacrifices for financial stability are common, but can sometimes come at the cost of personal life milestones.
A man in his late 30s has poured out his heart on Nate Pann, a popular Korean online forum, sparking a wave of empathy and discussion about the tough choices many face in modern Korean society. He shares his regret over a career decision that, while financially rewarding, might have cost him his chance at marriage and children.
The original poster (OP) explains that in his early 30s, he was dispatched as an expatriate (or "jujae-won") to an 'undesirable region' for his company. He couldn't refuse the opportunity, as it was a hard-won position. While he saved a significant amount of money during his time abroad, he now feels that his 'good years' for dating and settling down have passed him by. He's back in Korea and wants to get married, primarily to have children. However, he's finding that many women he meets on blind dates are also at an age where having children might be challenging or burdensome.
Facing the reality of being almost forty, he doubts younger women of 'marriageable age' (or "gyeolhon-jeongnyeonggi") would consider him. He's now contemplating giving up on marriage altogether or exploring international marriage, despite the potential difficulties of raising '2se' (second generation/children) in such a setup. His post highlights a common anxiety in Korea, where societal expectations for marriage and family often clash with demanding career paths and the ticking biological clock.